Things to do with Thanksgiving Leftovers
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Seal them in concrete and call it a time capsule. Send it to the Smithsonian with instructions to open in 3004.
Mix some Elmer's glue into the mashed potatoes and use as spackle.
Fill potholes in bumpy roads.
Stick broccoli and celery sticks in potting soil and display as rare and exotic bonsai.
Whittle turkey ribs into reusable toothpicks.
Refrigerate and save for when your least favorite relative comes for dinner a few months later.
Use as practice ammunition for that all-important Christmas food fight at your brother's house.
Freeze in little bags and save for Halloween next year. Hand them out as prizes for "least-tasteful costume" and "oldest trick or-treater."
Glue olives, celery sticks, etc. to create clever and whimsical figurines. Sell at local craft fairs as Christmas presents.
Put leftovers in boxes and wrap with festive holiday paper. Leave on the sidewalk for slow-witted, unsuspecting criminals.
Place it in your garden plot to create a juicy compost for next year's vegetable crop.