Total despair

7 LORD, you enticed me, and I was taken in. You were too strong for me, and you prevailed. Now I'm laughed at all the time; everyone mocks me.
8 Every time I open my mouth, I cry out and say, "Violence and destruction!" The LORD's word has brought me nothing but insult and injury, constantly.
9 I thought, I'll forget him; I'll no longer speak in his name. But there's an intense fire in my heart, trapped in my bones. I'm drained trying to contain it; I'm unable to do it.
10 I hear many whispering— "Panic Lurks Everywhere!— proclaim, yes, let's proclaim it ourselves!" All my friends are waiting for me to stumble: "Perhaps he can be enticed. Then we'll prevail against him and get our revenge on him!"
11 But the LORD is with me like a strong defender. Therefore, my oppressors will stumble and not prevail. They will be disgraced by their own failures. Their dishonor will never be forgotten.
12 The LORD of heavenly forces tests the righteous and discerns the heart and the mind. Let me see your retribution upon them, for I have committed my case to you.
13 Sing to the LORD, praise the LORD, for he has rescued the needy from the clutches of evildoers.
14 Cursed be the day that I was born. May the day my mother gave birth to me not be blessed.
15 Cursed be the one who delivered the news to my father, "You have a son!"— filling him with joy.
16 May the bearer of that news be like the cities that the LORD destroyed without mercy. May he hear screams in the morning, and the battle cries at noon,
17 because he didn't kill me in the womb and let my mother become my grave, her womb pregnant forever.
18 Why was I ever born when all I see is suffering and misery, and my days are filled with shame?