How Can We Lovingly Practice Discernment?

Be honest. If a relative stranger says, “I have the gift of discernment,” what is your mental picture of them? For me, I’m assuming that I am about to be judged for something. There are several online “discernment” ministries. Almost none of them are hopeful. They usually attempt to find the error in everything.

Is that what discernment means? How do the Scriptures define discernment, and how does it apply to our everyday lives?

What Is Discernment?

Discernment, simply, is the ability to judge well. In a Christian context, it takes upon a deeper meaning — it is the process of determining God’s desire in a situation, distinguishing between truth and error, right and wrong. We can see what discernment looks like by considering Philippians 1:9-11.

“And this is my prayer: that your love may abound more and more in knowledge and depth of insight, so that you may be able to discern what is best and may be pure and blameless for the day of Christ, filled with the fruit of righteousness that comes through Jesus Christ — to the glory and praise of God.”

Here Paul is praying that the Philippians will have a grounded love. That means a heart overflowing with love for others but one that is grounded in the truth of the gospel. Notice the “so that” in verse 10. The result will be the ability to discern what is best.

Picture discernment as a stamp of approval. Each day we have decisions running through our lives like a conveyor belt. The stamp will only fall on that which is marked “love in truth.” That is what discernment is. It’s like the elbow that drops the stamp upon each decision. Is this thing loving? Is this thing truthful? When we have this kind of discernment, it will lead us to live a life that is pure and blameless – marked by the love of Christ.

The Foundation of Discernment Is Hope

I believe we get discernment backwards. When you read something like “distinguishing between truth and error” which of those two words do you focus upon? If you’re anything like the rest of us, you focus on the word “error.” It’s our human condition. We tend to focus on the negatives rather than on the positives. We are hard-wired to do this for our survival. We tend to habituate what is good and keep ourselves alert for danger.

Yes, discernment includes rejecting everything that is error. It means being able to understand the things which are not made of “love and truth.” But the stamp goes on the positive. Discernment is about seeing the fingerprint of Jesus. It’s about spotting the good.

This is why we see what we do in Acts 11. The early church faced a conundrum with the influx of Gentiles into the church. They had been receiving the Spirit without jumping over any of the boundary markers of Judaism. It created quite a stir. What is God doing here? Is this a legitimate movement of God? They needed discernment.

Now, if the foundation of discernment is suspicion, think of what kind of person they’d send? They would send someone who was able to spot even the faintest glimpse of error. That isn’t who they send, though. They send Barnabas. As I’ve said before:

“Barnabas is an encourager. That’s a guy who can find a rose in a field of landmines. Not a guy who can find a landmine in a field of roses.

I’ll tell you why they sent Barnabas. They sent Barnabas because the foundation of Christian discernment is hope and not suspicion. Love rejoices at the truth. You know what that means? It means that when you go on a fact-finding mission, you’re looking for truth. And when you find it, even if just in a spark, you rejoice.”

Discernment means finding the good even more than it means rooting out the bad.

How Does Discernment Help in Daily Living?

We will face decisions every day. Some of them are black and white with clear moral answers. Most of them are less clear. Discernment means that we learn to see the fingerprints of Jesus so well that even good-looking rivals are discarded. What does this look like practically?

Think of how many advertisements you and I see per day. Each of these ads are attempting to tell us that their product is the most important thing for our lives. Without discernment, we will not know what is truly important. Discernment is what helps us to know that we don’t need to buy that product to be fulfilled in our lives. It helps us to pause and consider what will truly further love.

The same is true with things like false teaching. Discernment protects us from being blown away by every wind of doctrine. Usually, heresy will take a truth and expand it beyond its boundaries. It will attempt to make something central that is only peripheral. Discernment centers us.

Discernment can also help us to love others well. Imagine someone comes to you with a myriad of issues. You are flooded with information — each seeming like its own twisted problem. Where do you even begin? Discernment knows how to sift through and discover the core of the situation. One could use this gift improperly and fail to do the hard work of listening and walking through things with someone. Positively, such a gift could be used to provide substantial healing.

Perfect discernment would be like having a GPS system which never erred. You put in the coordinates “love in truth” and in every circumstance it will tell you each turn to make. Can you imagine how wonderful this would be? Not only would you never be duped, but you’d also know what decision is the most vital in any given situation. True biblical discernment is our assistant to help us know how to be Christ-like.

Think of what this would look like in personal relationships. Imagine being in a conversation with a friend offering advice. Discernment equips us to weigh their words, understand the intention of their hearts, know whether it is misguided, and if it truly would lead to the best path. In more complex situations, like resolving conflicts, discernment will guide you as you consider all the possible options. Discernment is particularly crucial in ensuring that the steps taken are not only good for the present moment but also align with God’s purpose for our lives.

Likewise, can you imagine what it looks like if you don’t have discernment? You’re tossed to and fro without any kind of anchor. This is why it’s a good idea to cultivate discernment.

How Do We Cultivate Discernment?

In some ways, discernment is a spiritual gift. It comes through having the Spirit of God who leads us into all truth. The Spirit plays a crucial role in discerning God’s will. The Spirit imparts wisdom and understanding, which are vital components to living in discernment.

Know the Gospel

We also cultivate discernment by knowing the gospel. The gospel is the central concern of the Bible and the central concern of all of our lives. What is vital is always Jesus. The more we know the gospel, then, the more we will know how to approve that which is excellent. If we don’t know the gospel well, then we will not be as attuned to seeing it.

Think of it like a police lineup. If you had studied a face day in and day out for several years, you’d have a really good chance to pick it out of a lineup. But you’d struggle if you only had a cursory experience with the person’s face. You could easily be duped by a look-alike. If we are daily rehearsing the good news of Jesus, then we’ll be equipped to see the fingerprints of Jesus.

We could say something similar about being rooted in Scripture. Psalm 119:105 says, "Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path." Familiarity with God’s Word helps you recognize whether something aligns with His teachings. The more we know God’s Word, the more we will be able to see connections from God’s Word intersecting with daily life.

Pray

It’s also helpful to pray for wisdom and seek the guidance of the Holy Spirit. James 1:5 says, “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you." God will make us discerning people if we ask Him for it. The Spirit loves to shine a spotlight on Jesus and illuminate truth for us.

Grow in Community

Discernment is also cultivated in community. Community keeps us grounded. Surrounding ourselves with spiritually mature believers helps us to grow in our own discernment. As we see them navigate life’s challenges, we learn not only from their successes but also their mistakes. Which means we have to be humble and put into practice the things we are learning. We have to learn from our experience as well as the experience of others. Humility and discernment are connected.

Discernment is vital. That is why it is unfortunate that it has been hijacked by the miserable and dour finger-pointers amongst us. True biblical discernment isn’t about spotting out every error and every deviation from truth. True biblical discernment is instead about highlighting the work of Jesus. In a world with many decisions, discernment sorts through what is vital.

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