Song Of Songs 5

But almost at once the wife realizes her mistake. She applies fragrant lotion to her hands and rushes to open the door to her lover—but he was gone (verse 6). Distraught,she runs out into the night to search for him. The night watchmen find her and beat her (verse 7)—we are not told why. She cries out to the daughters of Jerusalem, asking them to tell her husband that she loves him: I am faint with love (verse 8).

Why is this such an important passage? First of all, it shows us how the smallest mistake—laziness, hesitancy, lack of consideration—can damage a loving relationship. If we immediately confess our mistake and seek forgiveness, the relationship is not permanently harmed. To her credit, Solomon’s wife did seek to repair the damage at once; but such misunderstandings are always painful. The greater the love, the greater the pain.

The second reason this passage is important is because it teaches us a profound spiritual truth. The husband knocking at the door is a picture of Christ knocking at the “door” of our hearts (Revelation 3:20). When we feel the promptings of His Spirit, the “quiet voice” that speaks to our conscience, we must respond at once. Too often we hesitate, we rationalize, we ignore the Spirit’s voice; and when we finally “go to the door,” He is not there. The Spirit has been grieved (Ephesians 4:30) and has withdrawn. Countless Christians can testify that the secret of living in fellowship with God is to always remain sensitive to His voice and to respond to Him without delay. The fruitfulness of one’s Christian life depends on it.

9–16 As with verses 2–8, it’s not clear whether these verses are the continuation of the bride’s dream or the continuation of an actual event; either way, our understanding of the verses is not affected. Some friends (daughters of Jerusalem) ask the bride what’s so special about her husband (verse 9). And she is happy to answer in detail (verses 10–16).

The description the bride gives here is not necessarily related to the appearance or physical shape of her husband’s body; rather, it is meant to describe the sensuous effects his body produces in her mind. At the end, the bride says: This is my lover this my friend (verse 16). Marital love does not consist only of erotic feelings; far more important, it consists of friendship—mutual commitment, self-denial, and self-sacrifice. Jesus is our supreme model of love—for both the married and the unmarried. Our married lives should reflect His love for us, His love for His Church (Ephesians 5:25). Our spouse is our lover and our friend, for whom we would gladly lay down our life (John 15:12–13).