Pursuing Godliness: The Roles of Men and Women in the Church

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We live in a culture that is drowning in gender confusion. The lines have become blurred, and we are groping about trying to understand what it means for a man to be a man and a woman to be a woman, what it means for a man to be masculine and a woman to be feminine. A presidential candidate a few years back referred to himself as "metrosexual," a word that refers to a heterosexual male who is in touch with his feminine side. The candidate then went on to say, "I've heard the term, but I don't know what it means."22 It is perfectly clear that the cultural engineers that dominate the media, our educational system—from the preschools to the university—and other strategic places of influence want to neutralize, if not eliminate, the gender distinctions and differences God has hardwired into human beings (Gen 1:26-27). This is the consistent drumbeat heard again and again, and unfortunately the church has not been immune to the cadence.

Practicing homosexuals are now ordained as bishops. Divorced ministers continue in places of service as if nothing significant occurred when their marriage covenant was broken. Women (married, divorced, single, heterosexual, and lesbian) now flock to seminaries and fill pulpits across the land declaring their liberation from the oppressive writings of the Bible. Even within evangelical fellowships women aspire to teaching positions that place them over men in Sunday schools, Bible studies, and local church worship services. The church is being shaped by secular culture more than by sacred Scripture. Never has the church needed more desperately to hear the words of Titus 2:1-8. This is a text that makes God's plan, God's assignments, God's roles for men and women in the church plain and clear. In this passage of Scripture, Paul outlined God's expectations for each of the four major groups in the church in terms of gender and age. He defined godly living that is "consistent with sound doctrine." Though the word itself does not appear, the driving concept in these verses can be summed up in one important word: discipleship. Older men need to disciple younger men, and older women need to disciple younger women. The gospel is to produce godliness in the lives of those within the church, whether old or young, male or female.23255

Pursue God's Assignment as an Older Man

Pursue God's Assignment as an Older Man

Titus 2:1-2

Paul begins this section of Scripture by considering Titus in particular and older men in general and contrasting them with the false teachers who were harassing the church at Crete (1:10-15). These troublemakers were insubordinate, mouthy, and deceptive. They were liars, lazy, and motivated by money. They listened to the words of men, of popular culture, more than to the Word of God. They were infected with a defiled mind and a contaminated conscience, professing to know God but by their actions denying Him. They were "detestable, disobedient, and disqualified for any good work." Paul challenges Titus (v. 1) and the older, mature men (v. 2) to pursue a different path, a path that was "consistent with sound teaching." This is the path of gospel living that pleases God and provides a pattern for others to follow. He quickly defines seven essential characteristics of godliness for older men.

Be a Teacher (Titus 2:1)

Godly men are called by God to teach, recognizing that their teaching can take different and varied forms. "But you" is emphatic in the original language, denoting the sharp contrast between the false teachers and Titus. Titus was charged to "say the things that are consistent with sound teaching." The verb "say" is a present imperative (cf. 2:15), a word of command, here encouraging Titus to teach or instruct. Pastors are to teach things that are proper, in accord, fitting with sound doctrine. We must be true to the gospel of Jesus Christ and true to the Word of God both in belief and in behavior. The following verses provide the foundation that will ensure that we do not fail in this crucial task.

Be Levelheaded (Titus 2:2)

The more mature men in the church are admonished to be self-controlled, sober, temperate, or "level headed" (cf. 1 Tim 3:2, 11). This man is wise in his decision-making and careful when making judgments. He is clear on what really matters and decisive in making godly choices. He rightly uses his God-given talents and gifts, his time, his money, and his energy. He is a man with right and godly priorities, and he has as his motto for life one simple dictum: "All that matters in life is pleasing God."256

Be Reverent (Titus 2:2)

Second, he is to be "worthy of respect." This man goes after that which is noble and morally valuable and worthy. It is a character trait that God expects of the deacon (1 Tim 3:8) and his wife (1 Tim 3:11).24 This is the man who, while not being a prude or a Pharisee, takes no delight in inappropriate, off-color humor, vulgarity, or anything else that is suspect, questionable, or clearly out of bounds. He himself is worthy of honor and respect, particularly by younger men, because of the purity and integrity of his life.

Be Self-Controlled (Titus 2:2)

This is probably the key idea of this passage. Some form of the word appears to each of the four key groups of the church Paul addressed, though this is not readily apparent in our English translations (see vv. 2, 4-6): in verse 2 the older men are called to be "sensible"; in verse 4 the older women are called to "encourage" (or train) the younger women; in verse 5 the younger women are called to be "self-controlled," and in verse 6 the younger men are also called to be "self-controlled." This person has his passions under control and is self-disciplined. He is not careless or foolish with his words or in his behavior. John MacArthur summarizes well this quality of life, saying that such men "should have the discernment, discretion, and judgment that comes from walking with God for many years. They control their physical passions and they reject worldly standards and resist worldly attractions" (Titus, 74). They refuse to be conformed to this world but are transformed daily by a renewed mind bathed in Scripture (Rom 12:2).

Be Sound in the Faith (Titus 2:2)

Paul, in the last three terms in this verse, brings to our consideration the Christian triad of "faith, love, and endurance" (the natural outgrowth of hope). Mature godly men are to be sound or healthy in their confidence and trust in the Lord. This kind of personal faith is rooted in a daily walk with God as Father and an immersion of one's life in the Scriptures. This man not only knows what he believes and why he believes it; he257 knows in whom he believes. This is the man who says of his God, "Even when I cannot trace His hand, I can always trust His heart."25

Be Loving (Titus 2:2)

Jesus said in John 13:35 to His disciples on the night He was betrayed, "By this all people will know that you are My disciples, if you have love for one another." Love is mentioned in a general sense here. We are to love God supremely, fellow believers genuinely, and lost humanity fervently. This kind of love, beautifully portrayed in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, is to be the standard we strive to obtain day in and day out.

Be Patient (Titus 2:2)

The Christian, of all people, because of the hope that is within him, should be patient and steadfast; he should exhibit "endurance." Because we know how it will all come out in the end, we can endure testing, work through hardship, accept disappointment, and not give up under pressure and adversity. The mature, godly man does not lose heart, throw in the towel, or drop out of the race. Rather, he runs the race with endurance, fixing his eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher of faith (Heb 12:1-2).

My granddaddy Gallaway was a Titus 2:1-2 kind of man. A Georgia dirt farmer raised by a harsh stepmother, he had only a fifth-grade education. Even so, he was without question one of the godliest men I have ever known. Not well educated, afflicted with severe arthritis in his legs, and done wrong on more than one occasion because of his trusting nature, he never lost faith in his Lord, and he never questioned the plans and workings of God in his life. He lived simply on a day-by-day basis trusting in the Lord. He set an example any mother or father could have pointed to and said to their son, "I hope you grow up someday to be like Charley Gallaway in the way you love and serve the Lord." This is God's assignment for older men.258

Pursue God's Assignment as an Older Woman

Pursue God's Assignment as an Older Woman

Titus 2:3

Older women are now likewise charged with pursuing God's assignment of godliness in their personal lives as well as in their discipleship or mentoring of younger women. Again, much wisdom is presented for our careful consideration.

Several years ago Elisabeth Elliot wrote an article entitled "Where Are the WOTTs?" (Pulpit Helps, May 1997). She was moved to write the article after speaking to a group of pastors' wives and discovering that 80 percent of them were working outside the home. The question Elisabeth asked is simple and to the point: "Where are the godly older women who are to teach young mothers how to manage their children and homes? Where are the WOTTs, the Women of Titus Two?" Well, those women are described here in verse 3, and Paul provided them with a fourfold job description in terms of their own character that gave them the basis for their assignment of mentoring or discipling younger women as described in verses 4-5.

Be Reverent

"In the same way" connects verse 3 to verse 2. These "older women" have a task parallel to that of the older men. The first character trait they should pursue is reverence, a word that literally means "temple fitting" or appropriate behavior in a temple. The basic meaning is that this woman should live in such a way as is befitting a godly person. Her life and "behavior" are marked by holiness, reflecting the character of the Lord she loves and lives for.

Be Truthful

Godly women speak the truth; they are "not slanderers," making false and unfounded accusations. This Greek word is diabolos, the word from which we get our English word "devil." It is used to refer to our arch-enemy 34 times in the New Testament. A mature woman in Christ is not devilish in her speech, picking up gossip and spreading it abroad. This woman has a control, a governor, on her tongue. She knows that the saying "Sticks and stones may break my bones, but names (or words) will never hurt me" is not true. When she speaks, she speaks the truth, and she speaks it in love (Eph 4:15).259

Be Levelheaded

This daughter of God is "not addicted to much wine," to much alcohol. The original language is strong, admonishing her not to become enslaved to too much wine so that it owns, dominates, and controls her. Mounce points out, "Alcoholism must have been a severe problem since it is an issue in the appointment of church leaders in every list (1 Tim 3:3, 8; Titus 1:7; cf. 1 Tim 5:23). While this is true in almost every culture (cf. 1 Cor 11:21)... it was especially true in Crete [where they viewed] heavy drinking as a virtue" (Pastoral Epistles, 410). It is of course certain and undebatable that if one never takes the first drink one will never have to worry about drunkenness or alcoholism and all the misery that follows in the footsteps of drink. Wisdom and witness would make this a wise course of action. Bottom line: a godly woman controls both her tongue and her appetite—of course, the same applies to godly men!

Be a Teacher

Like their godly counterpart, the older men, these mature disciples of Christ are to be adept at teaching. Indeed, "They are to teach what is good." This is a unique word in all of Greek literature and may have been coined by Paul himself. The focus, in light of what follows in verses 4-5, is the informal, one-on-one or small-group instruction that these mature women pass on to their younger spiritual sisters. Issues of marriage, family, and child rearing are set alongside basic matters of spiritual life in Christ. This mentoring of the younger by the more mature is a biblical pattern we have too often neglected to our great hurt and harm. Younger women desperately need the role modeling, teaching, discipling, insight, and practical wisdom that these older ladies can provide. Being more experienced in life and in the Lord, they can pass on a godly legacy that will hopefully reproduce itself for generations. A godly home will orbit around a godly wife and mother.

Pursue God's Assignment as a Younger Woman

Pursue God's Assignment as a Younger Woman

Titus 2:4-5

Cultural pressure and expectations have robbed many women of the blessings and joys of homemaking and motherhood. The Feminist Movement made promises on which it could not deliver. The fallout has been mammoth and disastrous, and we are still in the midst of the260 whirlwind. It is obvious from this text that a feminist agenda and the resulting confusion and rejection of God-ordained roles is not restricted to the late twentieth and early twenty-first centuries. The first century suffered from this malady as well, and so Paul confronted it head on. He laid down God's assignment for the older woman as it related to the younger: "Teach what is good." What good teaching did Paul have in mind? He answers that question in verses 4-5.

Love Your Husband (Titus 2:4)

Older women were to "encourage," "admonish" (NKJV), or "train" (ESV), to counsel and advise the younger women "to love their husbands." Interestingly, this is the only time in the Bible where a woman is encouraged to love her husband, the man in her life. Husbands of course receive multiple and detailed instruction in this regard (Eph 5:25-33; Col 3:19). Paul was concerned that a woman's first commitment under the lordship of Jesus Christ was to her husband and her marriage. The way a couple loves each other will model for the children the way they should love their future spouses. The fact is, we do not so much "fall in love" as we "learn to love." What a great thing it is for daughters to learn how to love their future husbands by watching their mother love their dad!

Love Your Children (Titus 2:4)

Few things are more natural for a mother than loving her children. However, a young mother must move beyond her natural innate affection to a specific lifestyle and plan of action that will cultivate in her children godly character and affection. Proverbs 29:15 says, "A rod of correction imparts wisdom, but a youth left to himself is a disgrace to his mother." The most important way a mother can love her children is to love them to a saving knowledge of Jesus Christ as their personal Savior and Lord. As she loves them physically, emotionally, educationally, morally, socially, and spiritually, she always has her eye on their need for Christ. In word and deed, she gently and with sensitivity puts before them the love of God and the work of Christ. She speaks to her child with grace and wisdom sharing with him or her the grace, mercy, and claims of Jesus Christ. Her greatest joy and most awesome heritage is godly children devoted to Jesus and His plan and purpose for their lives.261

Be Self-Controlled (Titus 2:5)

Young women should also be sensible or "self-controlled." Paul again challenges a particular group in the church to exercise common sense and good judgment. The best way to learn this is to see it up close and personal in the life of another. Young women will best learn to exercise balance and wisdom in their lives as they observe it in the lives of older, more mature women.

Be Pure (Titus 2:5)

God calls a young woman to be "pure." Her moral life is above reproach, and she is by life and reputation a one-man kind of woman. She is faithful to her marriage vows and sexually gives herself to only one man, her husband. The man in her life trusts her and is confident in her. The God she serves sees His own character reflected in her life as it radiates forth from a heart surrendered to Jesus.

Be a Homemaker (Titus 2:5)

This lady is to be a good homemaker, "busy at home" (NIV). Her home is her primary base of operation and the main focus of her attention. Proverbs 31:10-31 teaches us that a diligent homemaker may be involved in a wide range of activities and interests. She is not lazy or a busybody, nor is she distracted by outside pursuits and responsibilities that eat up her precious time and attention. This woman is not seduced by the sirens of modernity who tell her she is wasting her time and talent as a homemaker and that it is the career woman who has purpose and is truly satisfied. The recent trend in women leaving the workplace and returning home has become too noticeable to be ignored. It is a reflection of what God planted in the heart of a wife and mother when He made her a female in His image. The blessings and joy she will discover as a wife, mother, and homemaker can never be matched by a career that in the end cannot make good on its promises. Being a homemaker is not an institutionalized form of bondage and slavery. It is the greatest context for a woman to experience liberation and liberty as she is set free by the plan of God to be the woman God created and saved her to be.

Be Good (Titus 2:5)

The word "kind" (or good) may modify "homemakers" or stand alone. A young woman should be kind. Simply said, she is to be like Jesus. She262 is to be gentle and considerate, gracious and merciful, even to those who may not treat her the same way. She is a "good woman" as the Bible defines good.

Be Subject to Your Husband (Titus 2:5)

In keeping with what is said consistently throughout the New Testament (Eph 5:21-24; Col 3:18; 1 Pet 3:1-5), wives were encouraged to be "submissive to their husbands, so that God's message will not be slandered." Submission means to yield in one's will to the leadership and direction of another. It is more of an attitude than an action, though one's attitude will certainly determine one's actions. Contrary to popular misconceptions, there is no inferiority in submissiveness. We see this plainly in the Trinity where Father, Son, and Holy Spirit are all equally God, and yet for the purpose of redemption, the Son submits in His assignment to the Father. Note also that a wife submits to her own husband, not every man. This charge is specific. Indeed, unless a husband asks his wife to do something unbiblical, illegal, immoral, or unethical, she is to follow his leadership. By doing this she will honor God and His Word, and she will reach, in a more effective manner, the heart of her husband.

Pursue God's Assignment as a Younger Man

Pursue God's Assignment as a Younger Man

Titus 2:6-8

Paul then addresses the fourth group, younger men. The implication is that they would be instructed in the way they should live by Titus and other older men who would provide the encouragement and the example they needed. Younger men need strong, healthy role models provided by older men. In an article in the South China Post, Dr. Peter Karl writes,

What a real man needs is another man to talk to and reinforce his maleness and help him be a better husband.... Without such a friend, men risk reverting to a mother-child relationship with a spouse.... Men become helpless and insecure and increasingly revert to the classic overgrown kid who expects to be mothered.... Men have few positive role models. (South China Post, April 23, 2000)

Paul recognizes the need younger men have for godly mentoring, and so he instructs them in a pattern of discipleship that would promote godly character, conviction, and commitment.263

Be Levelheaded (Titus 2:6)

"Encourage" is a present imperative, giving it the force of a command that is continually to be set before the younger men. Like the others they are encouraged to be sensible, "self-controlled in everything." This means they are in control of their lives, thoughts, and passions. Proverbs 4:23 reminds us, "Guard your heart above all else, for it is the source of life." The self-controlled man actively engages the battle for the mind, knowing that he must control and discipline his thought life if he is to win the battles of the Christian life.

Be a Good Example (Titus 2:7)

Addressing Titus once again as he also speaks to the younger men, Paul tells him, "Make yourself an example of good works." The Greek word for "example" gives us our English word "type." Titus was to be a type or mold "into which others can be impressed and therefore bear a likeness to him" (Mounce, Pastoral Epistles, 413). The great preacher from Antioch, John Chrysostom, said, "Let the luster of your life be a common school of instruction, a pattern of virtue to all." Young men should be on the lookout for godly men they can emulate, men they can pattern their life after.

Be Sound in Doctrine (Titus 2:7)

Young men must not be fooled into following false doctrine. They must exhibit "integrity and dignity in [their] teaching." The focus falls here more on "how" one teaches than "what" one teaches. Both are essential of course, but purity in motive and authenticity in manner is what Paul was after. A life of moral integrity must accompany the teaching ministry. Content and character, logos and ethos go together and must complement each other if the truth is to be taught without compromise and corruption.

Be Sound in Speech (Titus 2:8)

Integrity in doctrine comes from a pure vessel that pours forth "sound" or healthy speech. Paul charged Titus in this way: "Your message is to be sound beyond reproach, so that the opponent will be ashamed, having nothing bad to say about us." The pure word from a pure vessel is not subject to legitimate condemnation or criticism. In fact, those who criticize such faithful and holy teachers will eventually shame themselves264 because their accusations are without merit or substance. Hughes and Chapell say, "There should be a multiplication of silencers as the godly influence of Titus spreads among the young men and helps to heal the embattled church" (1 and 2 Timothy and Titus, 332). The gospel in our own day has been subjected to a great deal of ridicule. Far too often the cause of offense has not been the message but the messenger. If persons refuse to come to Christ, let it be the message they say no to, not the messenger who, because of a shameful life, clouds and even hides the purity of the Word of salvation.

Conclusion

Conclusion

The implications of the gospel are for every person and every area of life. In this passage this is demonstrated by the application of "sound teaching" to both men and women, calling them to lives of godliness and discipleship. When we carefully consider the whole of biblical revelation and its implications concerning the issue of the role of men and women in the church and the work of the Lord, several important conclusions need to be affirmed and applauded.

First, both man and woman are created in God's image, equal before Him as persons and distinct in their manhood and womanhood.

Second, differences in masculine and feminine roles both in the home and in the church are ordained by God as part of His good plan for His good creation. This is intended for God's glory and our good.

Third, the fall in Genesis 3 introduced distortions into the relationship between men and women with tragic consequences. As it relates to the church, sin leads men toward a worldly love of power on the one hand or to the abdication of spiritual responsibility on the other. With respect to women, sin inclines them either to resist the parameters established by God for their assignments or to neglect the use of their gifts in appropriate and God-honoring ministries.

Fourth, redemption through the perfect atonement of the Lord Jesus Christ aims at removing the distortions introduced by the curse and the fall.

Fifth, in the Lord's church, redemption in Christ gives men and women equal rights and an equal share in the blessings of salvation. These rights and blessings are in perfect accord with the leadership and teaching assignments within the church given only to men. The role of the pastor-teacher is an office restricted to men.265

Sixth, the God-given desire to serve the Lord that resonates both in men and in women should never be used to set aside the clear biblical pattern for ministry established by God in His Word. Seventh, billions of persons live without the knowledge of the saving Gospel of Jesus Christ. Countless other lost people live within those cultures that have heard the gospel. There are the heartbreak and miseries of sickness, malnutrition, homelessness, illiteracy, aging, drug and alcohol addictions, crime, incarceration, depression, and loneliness. Given this urgent need, no man or woman, boy or girl, having a God-given passion to make God's amazing grace known in word and deed, ever has to live without a vital and fulfilling ministry for the glory of God and the good of others in this fallen world.

Every child of God is called to proclaim the gospel to the lost. Every child of God is called to minister the Word. Every child of God is called to help the hurting. Every child of God at some time needs a mentor and is called to be a mentor. For the honor of Jesus and the sake of human souls, let us all be about the business of doing what God created us and saved us to do: His work, His way, and always for the praise of His Name.26 This is God's assignment for both men and women in the church.

Reflect and Discuss