The Disillusioned Believer

Jeremiah 15:10-21

Main Idea: When disillusionment descends into self-pity, repentance is paramount.

1. Complaining Can Lead to Disillusionment (15:10-14).
2. Complaining Can Lead to Bitterness and Resentment (15:15-17).
3. Complaining Can Lead to Self-Pity (15:18).
4. How Does God Respond to Self-Pity (15:19-21)?
   1. A condition (15:19)
   2. A promise (15:20-21)

I still remember the gnarly grass of our makeshift football practice field—small patches of crabgrass amid the dirt. It was not designed for long sits. The youth pastor at our church was to give a challenging devotional to the guys before practice that day and, though he shared it years ago, I remember his testimony. He was mentored by someone who had a severe physical handicap but never complained. This was his life lesson for us: never complain. It was a great reminder during two-a-days in August. Playing a sport was a recreational privilege—a privilege that demanded hard work. Never. Never. Complain.

When I would take mission trips with students, I established complaining as a cardinal sin—one that would get you a trip home. Complaining reveals a self-orientation. Complaining suggests that the circumstances of life do not meet the expectations I have set for everyone and everything else in my life, so, no matter how it affects someone else, I am going to verbalize my dissent with life. It is the responsibility of the loving parent, caring friend, or committed family member to keep others’ complaining in check. While accountability is uncomfortable, complaining left unchecked leads to another place—to self-pity.

This is where we find Jeremiah. His complaints are leading him to self-pity. This issue leads us to questions, some more relevant than others.

First, Is complaining ever warranted? The answer is of course in the eye of the beholder. We joke about “first-world problems” of poor Wi-Fi connections and slow smartphones. These are hardly justifiable complaints when painted on the canvas of the world’s ubiquitous suffering. So complaining seems ill advised.

This raises the second question: What does this say about the nature of Scripture? As noted before, Scripture includes many complaints. This helps us understand the perfection of Scripture. Scripture freely records complaints without passing judgment on the complainants. So, what does God do when we complain?

Context

We would certainly be sympathetic with Jeremiah’s complaint. He is sent on a difficult errand to preach, to re-present God’s words to a people who do not love God or want to hear what he says. The frequent references to the false prophets throughout the book testify that the people have chosen to displace true prophets with ones who say what they want to hear. Jeremiah has competition. In fact, when God called him, he called him “to uproot and tear down, to destroy and demolish, to build and plant.” There are twice as many negatives here as positives. Few, if any, wanted to hear this message.

God is going to hear the complaint of Jeremiah and respond.

Christopher Wright identifies three sources of his complaining: disillusionment, bitterness and resentment, and self-pity (Message of Jeremiah, 176–82).

Complaining Can Lead to Disillusionment

Jeremiah 15:10-14

Jeremiah’s general complaint is that he is the source of “dispute and conflict” (v. 10). This is intensified by the fact that he did not do anything wrong. He has not personally wronged anyone, yet they curse him. In fact, he rues the day of his birth. This is interesting because he was called in his mother’s womb:

The word of the Lord came to me:

I chose you before I formed you in the womb;

I set you apart before you were born.

I appointed you a prophet to the nations. (1:4-5)

Is 15:10 Jeremiah’s backhanded way of rejecting his call? He is not just complaining about his immediate situation but the source of his situation: his call to this difficult ministry. He’s not just complaining; the feeling of the text is that he wants to walk away—to trade a calling for a job.

The life of ministry is not for the faint of heart. There are many things that a preacher can do that he never will do because of his call.

God graciously responds to Jeremiah’s complaint in two ways. First, he affirms his protection for Jeremiah (v. 11). God will take care of him, though his enemies are strong and numerous.

Second, God affirms Jeremiah’s call by affirming the inevitability of the coming events (vv. 12-14). Judah would be taken into captivity by Babylon. The events were so sure it was as strong as “iron from the north.”

However, Jeremiah has more than disillusionment with his call. His unchecked disillusionment is leading to bitterness and resentment.

Complaining Can Lead to Bitterness and Resentment

Jeremiah 15:15-17

Jeremiah identifies the source of his problem: God (v. 15). Jeremiah is suffering disgrace, and he is doing it for God—for the sake of the call. His bitterness is now compounded because he clearly doesn’t deserve such trouble. This is why he is so upset. His expectations are unmet. This type of thing should not happen to this type of man. It’s not reasonable.

First, Jeremiah loved the word of God (v. 16a). Second, Jeremiah was called by God (v. 16b). Third, Jeremiah did not associate with those who hated God (v. 17). In fact, he was filled with godly indignation against that type of people. It just did not seem justifiable that such bad things should happen to such an obedient person. So with all of that, why would God treat him this way? In this passage Jeremiah says he is like the man of Psalm 1:1-3. He loves the word of God and does not associate with sinners. The man of Psalm 1 is the blessed man, but Jeremiah feels like the cursed man. Why is this happening?

Typically a blessing is indeed attached to obedience. This is clear enough from Scripture. However, a blessing is not a right or mandate. A blessing is just that: a blessing. It is given at the dictate and will of the divine Blesser. Since those he blesses do not have his perfect wisdom, it stands to reason that they will not always understand why he gives and takes away. This is a mercy, of course, but it is also a mystery.

The mystery of missing blessing is leading Jeremiah down the road of bitterness. Tragically, perhaps, this bitterness is leading to self-pity.

Complaining Can Lead to Self-Pity

Jeremiah 15:18

Jeremiah asks, Why am I in this situation that will never go away? It is like a wound that will not heal. The thought of relief cannot be conceived.

Then he uses a telling metaphor for God: God is like a mirage. A mirage is a problem because it appears real, but a mirage never quenched any thirsts. A mirage never refreshes. A mirage never heals. The mind is playing tricks on the body. This is how we feel in the low point of self-pity: we cannot be healed, and it is God’s fault.

Remember, self-pity is self-induced and therefore is self-oriented. It is not required or demanded. It is something we bring on ourselves.

So how does God respond to complaining that leads to disillusionment, bitterness, and self-pity? Jeremiah is told to repent.

How Does God Respond to Self-Pity?

Jeremiah 15:19-21

Jeremiah had gone too far. In resenting his call, developing bitterness against others, and manifesting self-pity, he had sinned. The call was a privilege but a hard privilege. God never promised that it would be easy or filled with affirmation. “By accusing God of deceiving him and of failing him when he needed him, Jeremiah had overstepped the bounds of what a servant of God can say” (Huey, Jeremiah, Lamentations, 163).

God then rebukes him (v. 19a). It is a simple and clear call to change his heart and to seek God and his call on his life. Yet, while the call is clear, it is also conditional. God expects things. The expectations God gives here serve as a model for ministry.

A Condition (15:19)

God was going to restore him. That was clear enough. However, the restoration was conditioned on a fresh commitment to God’s word. This may be the most concise statement on the call in Scripture: the choice to speak noble words and not worthless words. This is the antithesis of the prophets who were running when not sent and speaking before they had heard from God.

A Promise (15:20-21)

Once Jeremiah decides that he will speak God’s words and not his own words, God makes some specific promises. First, God will make him impenetrable (v. 20). This clearly does not mean a life free from attack. Rather, while he will be beaten, he will not be broken. As Paul would later say, “We are afflicted in every way but not crushed; we are perplexed but not in despair; we are persecuted but not abandoned; we are struck down but not destroyed” (2 Cor 4:8-9).

Second is a promise of deliverance (v. 21). Even though he will be attacked, he will not be broken, and even though he will be faced with powerful and evil people, he will not be under their control. Is there anything else one could ask for in ministry? We could of course ask to never face any hard people, but that is not ministry in any meaningful sense. Hardened people are in need of ministry. This is a good thing because ministering to hard people develops “hide” on the minister who is called to speak to them. This is Christian ministry: the ability to listen to God in the still quiet moments and then to take those insights where people do not respond. Soft heart, thick skin.

Perhaps this is why in Titus 1:8-9 Paul told Titus to find men to pastor churches who would hold “to the faithful message as taught, so that he will be able both to encourage with sound teaching and to refute those who contradict it.” A true pastor is both a lover and a fighter. Or more accurately, he fights because he loves. He loves God’s Word, so he is a steward of the Word, but he loves God’s people, so he is a shepherd of the sheep.

Conclusion

The existence of a disillusioned pastor may be more common than we know. Or perhaps it is not common enough. Jeremiah descended into self-pity because he was obedient. Don’t miss this. Jeremiah’s depression is not the hangover brought by the guilt of last night’s sin. He is not waking up to find that he has played fast and loose with the prompting of the Holy Spirit to his own demise. This is the residue of righteousness, what remains when someone has a long obedience in the same direction, as Eugene Peterson terms it. This is the ten-year pin of faithful service. He is suffering because his message was so contrary to the direction of the culture that he was understandably maligned, mistreated, abused, and eventually threatened with death. Perhaps we are not more disillusioned because our message of hope, peace, and prosperity can, in some synchronistic way, share the same vocabulary with a world that does not want suffering at any price—a world whose god is comfort and guilt-free sin. We are not discouraged by how the world treats us because we feigned niceties in order to be accepted by them. So, while we never want to be disillusioned, we should want the same obedience Jeremiah had.

Perhaps we struggle with disillusionment but for all the wrong reasons. We have expectations that God is obligated to provide a certain comfort in life, a certain set of circumstances, a certain gravitas in our career and grace to our life. Yet the life promised to the follower of Jesus Christ is no greater than the life of Christ. Jesus promised a discipling equity: If they hated Jesus, they will hate us. We are the mediator between a God who demands holiness and a world that demands its right to be unholy. How can we, under any circumstance, avoid that tension?

So, in a strange way, there is a disillusionment that would be natural for a believer. This cannot be avoided. What can be avoided is the descent of disillusionment into bitterness and self-pity. Disillusionment is unavoidable, while self-pity is a choice—a choice of which we can repent.

Reflect and Discuss

1. How does God initially respond to Jeremiah’s disillusionment (v. 15)?
2. Compare verse 15 with Psalm 51:10-12.
3. What is the difference between David’s restoration in Psalm 51 and Jeremiah’s restoration in Jeremiah 15?
4. What other Scriptures speak of God’s responding to us in similar ways?
5. How was God like a mirage to Jeremiah (v. 18)?
6. Can you relate to the word picture of God’s being a mirage?
7. Can you think of other biblical characters who had what they thought were genuine complaints against God?
8. Why is Jeremiah in an emotional tailspin?
9. Distinguish between being distraught because of sin and being distraught because of obedience and faithfulness.
10. What do we do if we find ourselves disillusioned?