Are You Right with Your Brothers and Sisters?

Matthew 5:21-26

Main Idea: God’s people must live at peace with others and seek to reconcile broken relationships lest they have an evil heart that God will judge.

1. Watch Your Heart before It Gives Way to Evil Actions (5:21-22).
2. Get Right with Your Brother before You Give Your Money to the Lord (5:23-24).
3. Settle Your Differences with Others Now if You Can, and Avoid Bigger Troubles Later (5:25-26).

It is a popular proverbial saying: “The heart of the matter is the matter of the heart.” It is popular and proverbial because it is true. Christian philosopher Dallas Willard is right when he says,

Actions do not emerge from nothing. They faithfully reveal what is in the heart. . . . The heart is not a mystery at the level of ordinary human interactions. We discern one another quite well. (Divine Conspiracy, 144)

In the previous verse (5:20) Jesus informed us that “unless your righteousness surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees, you will never get into the kingdom of heaven.” In other words, unless your righteousness exceeds the righteousness of these religious experts, who dotted every “i” and crossed every “t” of the law, you cannot be saved. The Bible is clear, however, that we cannot obtain such righteousness on our own. It is a gift granted by God to the humble in Spirit (v. 3) and the pure in heart (v. 8). Such righteousness is fundamentally different from one that rigidly and legalistically follows a list of rules, believing it has merited God’s acceptance. It is a righteousness amplified, clarified, and expounded in the remainder of the Sermon on the Mount, beginning with what is often called “the six antitheses” (5:21-48). Here Jesus contrasts the interpretation of the law by the scribes and teachers of the law with his own. Surveying the contrasts by quick comparison is helpful and instructive.

Charles Quarles captures the purpose of the antitheses when he writes,

The antitheses . . . contrast Jesus’ ethical demands with those of the Old Testament law as interpreted by the scribes. Jesus’ teaching and His interpretation of the Old Testament transcend the literal demands of the law. He surpassed the law by insisting that one should avoid sinful attitudes as well as sinful actions (5:21-30) . . . showing that the behavior of His followers is to be guided by God’s own character rather than merely by His commands (vv. 43-48). (Sermon, 106)

When Matthew writes about Jesus’s interpretation and teaching of the law, he continues to portray Jesus as a new Moses and the fulfillment of the Exodus: he is the Son God has called out of Egypt (Matt 2:15); he passes through the water in his baptism (3:13-17); he is tested in the wilderness (Matt. 4:1-11); he expounds the law of God in the mountainous region (Matt. 5:11). (Ferguson, Sermon, 82)

This new Moses knows that it is the relationships of life where the rubber meets the road, and so that is where he begins (vv. 21-26). Issues of anger and reconciliation head the list he will address.

Watch Your Heart before It Gives Way to Evil Actions

Matthew 5:21-22

The phrase “You have heard that it was said” (or a form of it) fronts each of the six antitheses (vv. 21, 27, 31, 33, 38, 43). Jesus begins with the Bible’s prohibition against murder, the sixth of the Ten Commandments (Exod 20:13; Deut 5:17). He then adds a summary of Old Testament teachings regarding the penalty for murder: “Whoever murders will be subject to judgment.” Those who murder were to stand trial, and if found guilty, they were sentenced to death (Exod. 21:12; Lev. 24:17; Num. 35:12; Deut. 17:8-13). (Quarles, Sermon, 108)

This has all the trappings of a criminal case in a court of law.

God, however, has more in mind than just prohibiting the evil act of premeditated murder. He is concerned with both murderous acts and murderous attitudes. He knows the issue is ultimately one of the heart. Thus, in verse 22 Jesus warns us about even allowing the attitude that could lead to murder. Again he knows the issue is ultimately a heart issue. He warns us about allowing the attitude of anger to get a foot in the door of our heart.

The Bible has quite a bit to say about anger in both the Old Testament and the New Testament. It is obviously an important subject to God. Therefore, it should be important to us. Consider these passages:

Refrain from anger and give up your rage; do not be agitated—it can only bring harm. (Ps 37:8)

A patient person shows great understanding, but a quick-tempered one promotes foolishness. (Prov 14:29)

A gentle answer turns away anger, but a harsh word stirs up wrath. (Prov 15:1)

A hot-tempered person stirs up conflict, but one slow to anger calms strife. (Prov 15:18)

Don’t make friends with an angry person, and don’t be a companion of a hot-tempered one. (Prov 22:24)

A fool gives full vent to his anger, but a wise person holds it in check. (Prov 29:11)

Don’t let your spirit rush to be angry, for anger abides in the heart of fools. (Eccl 7:9)

Be angry and do not sin. Don’t let the sun go down on your anger, and don’t give the devil an opportunity. (Eph 4:26-27)

But now, put away all the following: anger, wrath, malice, slander, and filthy language from your mouth. (Col 3:8)

My dear brothers and sisters, understand this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger, for human anger does not accomplish God’s righteousness. Therefore, ridding yourselves of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent, humbly receive the implanted word, which is able to save your souls. (Jas 1:19-21)

In Matthew 5:22 Jesus stairsteps his argument in a descending and intensifying manner. Each immoral action is followed by a more severe consequence. Jesus begins by saying that anger with your brother or sister makes you liable to judgment. Next, he says that insulting your brother or sister makes you liable to the council (the Sanhedrin). Finally, he says that calling your brother or sister a fool (Gk. moros; moron) makes you liable to God’s judgment and to hell itself. Quarles points out the severity of the final insult and notes,

The use of mros in Matthew’s Gospel shows that it is far more severe than merely calling someone an idiot. The word is used in Matthew 7:26; 23:17; 25:2-3, 8 to describe those who do not truly belong to the kingdom. Calling a brother “moron” was essentially calling him unregenerate and unsaved and consigning him to hell. (Sermon, 110–11)

The word for “hell” is the Greek word Jer 7:31-32; 19:6). It is a place of unquenchable fire (Matt 3:12; 22:13; 25:30) and eternal punishment (Matt 25:46). Only God has the power to cast both body and soul into hell (see also Luke 12:5).

Jesus’s words would have sounded extreme to his listeners. They certainly do to us. Don’t give in to the temptation to water them down. He meant to shock our dull sensibilities. Jesus purposefully states things in the extreme to make clear that the expectations and standards of the kingdom of God far exceed those of this fallen, evil world and the standards set by sinful humanity. God is not merely concerned about your external acts. He is concerned about the condition of your heart, which is the source of those acts. Jesus makes the point again in Mark 7:20-23 when he says,

What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of people’s hearts, come evil thoughts, sexual immoralities, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, evil actions, deceit, self-indulgence, envy, slander, pride, and foolishness. All these evil things come from within and defile a person.

Watch your heart. Guard your heart. The stakes are high.

Get Right with Your Brother before You Give Your Money to the Lord

Matthew 5:23-24

The word “so” that begins verse 23 points to an important connection. The following verses (vv. 23-26) illustrate the strong words of Jesus in verses 21-22. Because of our differing historical contexts, there is not a one-to-one correspondence in the specific details between the first century and our own. However, there are basic abiding principles that transcend all cultures and are true for all persons anytime, anywhere, and under any circumstances.

Jesus gives two illustrations (vv. 23-24 and vv. 25-26). The first has to do with our financial giving to the Lord. In this scenario you come to the temple to worship. A component of that worship is giving. You place your offering on the altar before the Lord, but then your conscience reminds you that “your brother or sister has something against you” (v. 23). This is not some unreasonable, irrational grudge but a true and legitimate grievance. You have genuinely hurt and wronged your brother or sister. A real problem needs attention. What does the Lord expect? Verse 24 provides the answer: “Leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled with your brother or sister, and then come and offer your gift” (emphasis added). You cannot worship God with integrity without having a clear conscience and right relationships with your brothers and sisters. It is foolish and hypocritical even to try. Ferguson is right:

[Jesus] recognizes that our relationship with God is primary, but we always appear before God as those related, rightly or wrongly, to our fellow men. What we are before God involves how we are related to others. (Sermon, 84)

Carson is even more direct when he says,

Forget the worship service and be reconciled to your brother; and only then worship God. Men love to substitute ceremony for integrity, purity, and love; but Jesus will have none of it. (Jesus’ Sermon, 45)

The Bible is clear that God is concerned with more than the external giving. He is concerned with the heart of the person who gives. Second Corinthians 9:7 teaches us, “God loves a cheerful giver.” Matthew 5:24 adds that God loves a giver with a clear conscience. And Matthew 5:9 tells us that citizens of the kingdom are peacemakers. Our text before us calls us to be peacemakers before we worship, specifically, before we worship God with our giving. Otherwise, our gifts mean nothing as far as God is concerned.

Settle Your Differences with Others Now if You Can, and Avoid Bigger Troubles Later

Matthew 5:25-26

Jesus’s second illustration begins in verse 25. Interestingly, the word “brother” is replaced by the word “accuser” or “adversary.” The issue, however, is similar. You find yourself at odds with another person. The nature of the disagreement is of such severity that it appears the courts must get involved. This has all the components of a civil case, something Paul addresses in 1 Corinthians 6 in a manner similar to what Jesus does here.

Now a key biblical principle undergirds what Jesus is teaching us. We find it in Romans 12:18: “If possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” From this instruction, in the context of Matthew 5:25-26, John Piper makes two helpful observations:

1. We are only responsible for what others hold against us when it is owing to real sin or blundering on our part.
2. We are responsible to pursue reconciliation, but live with the pain if it does not succeed. In other words, we are not responsible to make reconciliation happen. (“Getting Right with God”; emphasis original)

So a problem arises that could go to court. If it is possible, take the initiative to prevent this from happening. Work quickly and seek to make the issue right. Do this as fast as you can lest it gets to court, you lose, you wind up in prison (in that historical context), and you are forced to pay an even more hefty fine or payment, an obligation that will probably fall on your family or friends since you will be in prison. Settle now and avoid additional sorrow and headache. The longer you wait to seek reconciliation, the more severe the consequences are likely to be. Keep things from escalating. Act now. Spurgeon says it well: “A lean settlement is better than a fat law-suit . . . make peace with the utmost promptitude” (Exposition, 27).

Jesus’s teaching should prompt us to ask ourselves some important questions:

• Are we responsible for any grudges someone has against us?
• Are we responsible for any anger someone has against us?
• Are we responsible for any bitterness someone has against us?
• Are we responsible for any hostility someone has against us?

If the answer is yes, then we must do something about it. It is absolute hypocrisy to say you are good with God but not good with others. Even if you are not the angry or offended party, if you know there is a problem, Jesus says to seek to resolve it. God, who is the ultimate reconciler, has called us to a reconciling mind-set, a reconciling heart.

Conclusion

Sinclair Ferguson summarizes this text of Scripture well: “Jesus is not telling us to ‘hang out our dirty linen in public,’ but rather to deal urgently and fully with all breakdowns in fellowship before they lead to spiritual assassination” (Sermon, 86). God has called those who have experienced the peace of God to be peacemakers, in so far as they can, with others. God has called those who have experienced reconciliation to be reconcilers, in so far as they can, with others. It requires humility. It requires reaching out and getting out of your comfort zone. But you will joyfully discover that it is worth it! Our God, in reconciling us through Jesus, thought it was.

Reflect and Discuss

1. Why does Jesus move from commands like “Do not murder” and “Do not commit adultery” to warnings against anger and lust? What is the purpose of these antitheses?
2. Read Mark 7:20-23 again. How do our outward actions and reactions reveal the health of our hearts? What is the solution to our evil actions?
3. Is Jesus teaching that anger and murder are equal sins? Why or why not?
4. Why is it important not to call our brother or sister “fool”? What does this action reveal about one’s heart toward one’s brother or sister?
5. What is the principle from Jesus’s illustration about giving an offering in the first-century context? Can this principle apply to areas other than giving financially? How?
6. How does Jesus’s warning to settle disputes contrast with appropriately using the legal system, for example, to further justice in the world?
7. Review the four important questions this chapter gives to assess your relationship with your brothers and sisters. Are there people you need to reconcile with? What steps can you take this week to do so?
8. How do Jesus’s actions in the Gospel exemplify the type of reconciliation we should pursue?
9. What does this passage teach us about God’s view of sin?
10. How do these antitheses relate to Jesus’s call for a righteousness that surpasses that of the scribes and Pharisees in 5:20?