Common English Bible CEB
The Message Bible MSG
1 The words of Agur, Jakeh's son, from Massa. The man declares: I'm tired, God; I'm tired, God, and I'm exhausted.
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The skeptic swore, "There is no God! No God! - I can do anything I want!
2 Actually, I'm too stupid to be human, a man without understanding.
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I'm more animal than human; so-called human intelligence escapes me.
3 I haven't learned wisdom, nor do I have knowledge of the holy one.
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"I flunked 'wisdom.' I see no evidence of a holy God.
4 Who has gone up to heaven and come down? Who has gathered the wind by the handful? Who has bound up the waters in a garment? Who has established all the ends of the earth? What is this person's name and the name of this person's child— if you know it?
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Has anyone ever seen Anyone climb into Heaven and take charge? grab the winds and control them? gather the rains in his bucket? stake out the ends of the earth? Just tell me his name, tell me the names of his sons. Come on now - tell me!"
5 All God's words are tried and true; a shield for those who take refuge in him.
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The believer replied, "Every promise of God proves true; he protects everyone who runs to him for help.
6 Don't add to his words, or he will correct you and show you to be a liar.
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So don't second-guess him; he might take you to task and show up your lies."
7 Two things I ask of you; don't keep them from me before I die:
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And then he prayed, "God, I'm asking for two things before I die; don't refuse me -
8 Fraud and lies— keep far from me! Don't give me either poverty or wealth; give me just the food I need.
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Banish lies from my lips and liars from my presence. Give me enough food to live on, neither too much nor too little.
9 Or I'll be full and deny you, and say, "Who is the LORD?" Or I'll be poor and steal, and dishonor my God's name.
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If I'm too full, I might get independent, saying, 'God? Who needs him?' If I'm poor, I might steal and dishonor the name of my God."
10 Don't slander a servant to his master; otherwise, the servant will curse you, and you will be guilty.
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Don't blow the whistle on your fellow workers behind their backs; They'll accuse you of being underhanded, and then you'll be the guilty one!
11 There are those who curse their father and don't bless their mother.
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Don't curse your father or fail to bless your mother.
12 There are those who think they are clean, but haven't washed off their own excrement.
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Don't imagine yourself to be quite presentable when you haven't had a bath in weeks.
13 There are those— how arrogant are their eyes; how their eyebrows are raised!
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Don't be stuck-up and think you're better than everyone else.
14 There are those whose teeth are swords; their jaw is a butcher's knife, ready to devour the needy from the earth, and the poor from humanity.
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Don't be greedy, merciless and cruel as wolves, Tearing into the poor and feasting on them, shredding the needy to pieces only to discard them.
15 The leech has two daughters: “Give, give!” There are three things that are never satisfied, four that never say, “Enough!”:
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A leech has twin daughters named "Gimme" and "Gimme more." Four Insatiables Three things are never satisfied, no, there are four that never say, "That's enough, thank you!" -
16 the grave and a barren womb, a land never filled with water, and fire that doesn't say, “Enough!”
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hell, a barren womb, a parched land, a forest fire.
17 An eye that mocks a father and rejects obedience to a mother, may the ravens of the river valley peck it out, and the eagle's young eat it.
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An eye that disdains a father and despises a mother - that eye will be plucked out by wild vultures and consumed by young eagles. Four Mysteries
18 Three things are too wonderful for me, four that I can't figure out:
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Three things amaze me, no, four things I'll never understand -
19 the way of an eagle in the sky, the way of a snake on the rock, the way of a ship out on the open sea, and the way of a man with a young woman.
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how an eagle flies so high in the sky, how a snake glides over a rock, how a ship navigates the ocean, why adolescents act the way they do.
20 This is the way of an adulterous woman: she eats and wipes her mouth, and she says, "I've done nothing wrong!"
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Here's how a prostitute operates: she has sex with her client, Takes a bath, then asks, "Who's next?" Four Intolerables
21 At three things the earth trembles, at four it can't bear up:
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Three things are too much for even the earth to bear, yes, four things shake its foundations -
22 at a servant when he becomes king and fools when they are full of food;
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when the janitor becomes the boss, when a fool gets rich,
23 at a detested woman when she gets married and a female servant when she replaces her mistress.
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when a whore is voted "woman of the year," when a "girlfriend" replaces a faithful wife. Four Small Wonders
24 Four things are among the smallest on earth, but they are extremely wise:
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There are four small creatures, wisest of the wise they are -
25 Ants as creatures aren't strong, but they store away their food in the summer.
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ants - frail as they are, get plenty of food in for the winter;
26 Badgers as creatures aren't powerful, but they make their homes in the rocks.
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marmots - vulnerable as they are, manage to arrange for rock-solid homes;
27 Locusts don't have a king, but they march together in ranks.
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locusts - leaderless insects, yet they strip the field like an army regiment;
28 You can catch lizards in your hand, but they are in kings' palaces.
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lizards - easy enough to catch, but they sneak past vigilant palace guards. Four Dignitaries
29 There are three things that are excellent in their stride, four that are excellent as they walk:
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There are three solemn dignitaries, four that are impressive in their bearing -
30 a lion, a warrior among beasts, which doesn't back down at anything;
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a lion, king of the beasts, deferring to none;
31 the strut of a rooster or a male goat; and a king with his army.
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a rooster, proud and strutting; a billy goat; a head of state in stately procession.
32 If you've been foolish and arrogant, if you've been scheming, put your hand to your mouth,
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If you're dumb enough to call attention to yourself by offending people and making rude gestures,
33 because churning milk makes curds, squeezing the nose brings blood, and stirring up anger produces strife.
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Don't be surprised if someone bloodies your nose. Churned milk turns into butter; riled emotions turn into fist fights.