Communicating with clarity is a challenging endeavor. Consider these supposedly true citations and responses between airline pilots and mechanics:

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
M: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
M: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
M: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
M: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: IFF inoperative.
M: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
M: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
M: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
M: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
M: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.


J. Michael Shannon is professor of preaching at Cincinnati Bible College in Cincinnati, OH.