Biblical Encouragement for Those Facing Infertility

Children are a blessing from the Lord, and having children is one of the first commands God gave every living creature on the earth, including people. Pursuing a family is something most people strive to do. For some individuals though, having children is difficult, or they are not capable of doing so due to a variety of factors.

The more someone wants a child, the harder facing infertility can be. It can seem like God is playing a cruel trick on the people seeking to be parents, or is coldly indifferent to the suffering the situation is causing. God is our heavenly Father, and even though He was in perfect unity with the Son and the Spirit before time began, He desired to create more children for Himself, more beings to love; He intimately understands the desires of those who struggle to have children, and His Word is full of messages of comfort, hope, and peace for those who need it.

Infertility is not a punishment from God, but a byproduct of living in a fallen world; it can also be an opportunity to get to know the Lord better, and pursue different kinds of opportunities to create a family.

Who in the Bible Struggled with Infertility?

The Bible is full of people with struggles that reflect our modern problems, including infertility. Understanding their stories can inform an understanding of how to cope with the problem today. While some of these cases were supernaturally resolved, others were not. Some of the most prominent cases of infertility mentioned in the Bible are:

Abraham and Sarah: It took so long for Abraham and Sarah to conceive, that when she heard the Angel of the Lord say it would happen, she laughed! Sarah was 90 when God finally opened her womb and let her have Isaac. Read their story in Genesis 15-21.

Isaac and Rebekah: It seems this couple was smitten with one another when they first met, but the Bible records that, at first, they could not have children. God eventually blessed them with twins who came out causing trouble. Read their story in Genesis 25.

Jacob and Leah and Rachel: The infertility here is a bit more supernatural than the others, as God opened and closed the wombs of Jacob’s wives because of Jacob’s treatment of them - an interesting study on its own about the problems of bigamy. At first, he only loved Rachel, so God blessed Leah with children. Eventually, God did allow Rachel to have children as well. Read their story in Genesis 29-30.

Elkanah and Hannah: A man named Elkanah had two wives, Peninnah and Hannah. The Bible records that while the former had children, the latter did not. Her prayer for a child is one to which many women struggling with infertility can relate. When she did have a son, she kept her word that he would live for God. Read their story in 1 Samuel 1-2.

David and Michal: King David had several wives, but one of them was the daughter of his predecessor Saul, and the sister of his best friend Jonathan. The Bible states she never had children. It does not explain why. To learn more about Michael, read 1 Samuel 18-19 and 2 Samuel 3-6.

Zachariah and Elisabeth: A few months before Mary learned she would carry the Messiah, her older cousin Elisabeth learned she would carry a child in her old age. Just like Sarah, they had gone many years without children, and Zechariah doubted the message from the angel about having a son. Read their story in Luke 1.

There are even more stories in the Bible of couples who struggled to get pregnant that can be a source of comfort and hope.

What Does the Bible Say about Infertility?

Infertility is the inability to conceive a child through the natural course of things. In modern times, there are some conditions that cause infertility that can be addressed through medicine, but for millennia this was not the case. As far back as Abraham, there are stories of families struggling to have children.

In ancient times, women who struggled to conceive carried a lot of stigma and shame, because it was thought their condition had to do with their morality, behavior, or sin. The Bible demonstrates time and time again that this idea is not true. Instead, many of the couples who struggled with infertility were righteous and loved the Lord. The fallen nature of the world because of sin means that not everything works as it should, and bodies do not always work as God intended.

When looking at couples who struggle with infertility, there are a few common elements. Some of the couples accepted their state of childlessness, and God surprised them by supernaturally intervening. Others prayed fervently for a baby, and God responded.

Bible Verses about Infertility

The Word of God does not just tell the history of the world from God’s point of view, it also is a source of comfort and guidance for those who are struggling. Verses for those who are having a hard time conceiving include: 

Psalm 113:9 “He gives the barren woman a home, making her the joyous mother of children. Praise the Lord!”

Genesis 25:21 “ And Isaac prayed to the Lord for his wife, because she was barren. And the Lord granted his prayer, and Rebekah his wife conceived.”

Psalm 127:3 “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward.”

Romans 5:3-5 “More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.”

John 16:33 “I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.”             

Psalm 147:3 “  He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”                                         

Philippians 4:6-7 “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

Psalm 37:3-7 “Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land and befriend faithfulness. Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the Lord; trust in him, and he will act. He will bring forth your righteousness as the light, and your justice as the noonday. Be still before the Lord and wait patiently for him; fret not yourself over the one who prospers in his way, over the man who carries out evil devices!”

Is Fertility a Gift from God?

Because God intended for creation to participate in continuing itself, fertility is a gift God gave to living creatures to be a part of that process. The Psalmist wrote, “Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior are the children of one's youth.  Blessed is the man who fills his quiver with them! He shall not be put to shame when he speaks with his enemies in the gate” (Psalm 127: 3-5).

Being infertile, however, does not mean God is punishing someone. He may be working out their faith through struggle. He could be preparing them for a miracle. He may be calling them to be a parent and fill their quiver through adoption, providing a loving family and raising children in the faith who otherwise would not have that experience. Prayer is the key to following and trusting God through the struggle with infertility.

A Prayer for the Couple Struggling with Infertility

Holy Father,

Thank you for loving us enough to bring us together as husband and wife, a family that represents your Son as the bridegroom and the church as His bride. Lord, we come to you with a deep hurt. We want to have a child, but conceiving has been difficult. We ask that Your hand would be upon us, that You would resolve the problems, and help us to conceive and carry a baby. Please grant us patience through this process.

Lord, we also ask for guidance, and peace about what to do if this continues. Should we pursue IVF? Should we consider adopting? Guide us through your Holy Spirit to Your will. Your Word tells us, “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.”

Lord, even though we are struggling, we lift up praise to Your Holy Name, and thank you for Your comfort and guidance.

In the name of Jesus Christ, we pray,

Amen.

A Prayer to Encourage a Friend Who Is Struggling

Holy Father,

Thank you for the friends in my life. Thank you for the bonds of love between us, and I praise you for being the greatest of friends. Lord, my dear friend is struggling with infertility right now. You know the deepest desires of the heart, and know their sincere desire for a child. Lord, I know you are sovereign over all things, including the conception of children. Lord, I lift up my friend to You, and ask that You send comfort and encouragement during this difficult period. Let the Holy Spirit envelope them in Your love, and Your promises. Lord, show me how I can be a greater source of peace for them during this period.

In Jesus’ name I pray,

Amen.

God has a plan for every person He creates, and loves them, even if they do not receive the same blessings as others. While being in the midst of trying to conceive and being unable to can seem unbearable, the Lord is there to comfort and guide. He may be inviting that couple to be part of an adoption, just like He adopted sinners through Jesus Christ. They may serve as spiritual parents through teaching and mentoring. Whether God blesses that couple with biological children, or through some other means, God hears the prayers of those who cry out to Him, and will respond in His great love.

“Sometimes we’re afraid to look at the mysteries, afraid even to admit the existence of things we can’t understand. We’d rather try to ignore it, deny it. But the true child of the Father is sure of His love, and with eyes wide open accepts them. With eyes wide open to the mercies of God, we can bear with the storms. We can love even the storms because within them they carry God’s sovereign and merciful purposes for us…when things seem most utterly wrong, they are going most right. When prayers seem unheard and unanswered, they are those from which we will get the most magnificent answers.” - Elizabeth Elliot

Sources

Forbus, Beth. Surviving Infertility What the Bible Says about Your Baby Hunger. Crossbooks, 2011.

Haley, Amanda Hope. Barren Among the Fruitful Navigating Infertility with Hope, Wisdom, and Patience. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 2014.

Saake, Jennifer. Hannah’s Hope Seeking God's Heart in the Midst of Infertility, Miscarriage, and Adoption Loss. Hanford: Nav Press, 2005.

Photo credit: Pexels/Luis Quintero

Bethany Verrett is a freelance writer who uses her passion for God, reading, and writing to glorify God. She and her husband have lived all over the country serving their Lord and Savior in ministry. She has a blog on graceandgrowing.com.