5 Warning Signs of a "Holier-Than-Thou" Attitude
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Self-righteous, priggish, sanctimonious: people with these types of attributes are typically found to be carrying an attitude of believing that they are better than most, if not all. This is someone with a holier-than-thou attitude. Some may believe this is because a person doesn’t know Jesus personally or have a relationship with God, while others might say that some, once they become Christians, begin to cultivate an attitude that others are beneath them, especially those of non-believers.
The phrase, holier than thou, can typically be used to describe this type of person, but what does it mean to be holier than thou? And once you know what it means to be holier than thou, could you actually be exhibiting this behavior and not realize it?
As we learn what it means to act holier than thou, we will also see some classic examples of this personality within the pages of the Bible, even shared in one of Jesus’s most recognizable parables that shows the difference between self-righteousness and humility. Maybe by learning these facts, we can all assess ourselves and determine areas where we carry holier-than-thou attitudes that we need to change.
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How Is "Holier Than Thou" Depicted in the Bible?
Not much can be found on how the term holier than thou was first created, but according to Merriam-Webster Dictionary, the term was first used in 1859 and means “marked by an air of superior piety or morality.” The words used at the start of this article are secondary words to define the characteristics of believing you are more superior than others.
The most valuable resource in learning about displaying a holier-than-thou attitude is within God’s Word. The Bible is filled with examples of those who lived humbled lives next to those who lived lives believing God had blessed them more than others.
There were many examples of people who portrayed self-righteous behavior in the Bible: King Solomon, who had great wisdom but arrogantly chose to have many foreign wives who led him down the wrong path in worshipping other gods; the prophet Jonah, who refused to go to Nineveh to help in the salvation of its people and then argued with God that they were not worth being saved.
Who could forget the Sanhedrin, who famously provoked the crowds to go against Jesus because they didn’t like that He was pointing out their self-righteousness; or the apostle Peter, who said that he wouldn’t turn his back on Jesus, only to do exactly as the Savior predicted in His hour of need.
Jesus knew well the trappings that a holier-than-thou attitude would have on a person, exemplifying this in His memorable parable, “The Pharisee and the Tax Collector,” in Luke 18:10-14. In the parable, a Pharisee and a tax collector went to the temple to pray one day, with the Pharisee going first: “God, I thank You that I am not like other men — extortioners, unjust, adulterers, or even as this tax collector. I fast twice a week; I give tithes of all I possess.” When it was the tax collector’s time to speak, he didn’t look up but beat his chest and said, “God, be merciful to me a sinner!” The parable ends with Jesus saying the man who humbles himself would be exalted by God while the man who exalts himself would be humbled by God.
God didn’t create each of us to feel that others were inferior, but that we are all made in His image and with our own personalities, abilities, and gifts to be used as elements of God’s eternal plan. When we throw what we have in the face of others, we might as well throw it also in the face of God, for it is a slap in the face to Him who loves all and doesn’t play favorites.
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5 Warning Signs of a Holier-Than-Thou Attitude
Even today, God is still letting us know when we have been believing too much of our own hype and He usually uses tactics to humble us to make us aware of this behavior.
To avoid these lessons, I compiled a list of five warning signs that you (or someone you know) might be expressing a holier-than-thou attitude. And, if it is someone you know, you might want to rethink how to let the person know so you don’t expose a holier-than-thou attitude yourself.
1. You Feel You Have to Save Someone/Everyone
As followers of Christ, we all have the desire to help those around us that need help of some kind. However, sometimes people will feel they have to help others in view of others, even if that person can help themself. The belief may be that they aren’t capable of helping themselves or that only you can be the one to help them because of ability, knowledge, or experience.
But if helping someone is only to make the person and your peers see you as worthy of applause and accolades, then you are showing yourself with a holier-than-thou attitude of being a savior to someone you have deemed “less fortunate.” If you were to offer help to someone, don’t make a spectacle of it or say something demeaning like, “Oh I know you need help,” but ask him/her in private if possible or say as an open-ended suggestion like, “If you need help, I’m available.”
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2. Comparing Yourself to Others in That You Wouldn’t Do This or That
This might be the classic example of displaying a holier-than-thou attitude, as many can attest to seeing this as the common judgmental or prideful attitude people have shown, and, unfortunately, it is a common problem among some Christians. It is usually noticed when people state they would never do something or be like someone because they have standards that are above those who do.
Their self-righteousness makes them believe they couldn’t fall into temptation or make the wrong decisions in any way that would lead them down the same path as the person in question. But if that were true, we wouldn’t need a Savior to have died for our sins. So, if you are prone to talking in this way when someone is sharing his/her problems with you, or when you learn of some hardship someone is going through, stop yourself before saying, “I would never…” because you might be in the same situation as them at any time.
3. Feel You Have to Follow Certain Criteria or Being Obsessive about the Law
This is sort of a two-fold warning sign, as this can apply to those that are still striving to follow Old Testament guidelines that will make us worthier to God, the Law, or to follow any kind of criteria to make themselves worthier of certain gifts, blessings, or titles. The Sanhedrin come to mind with the warning sign of obsessing over the Law, as those of the Sanhedrin felt they were the only ones touched by God to uphold and execute the Law among others.
This can also be expressed in any type of criteria people want to follow, as there will be some who feel they are the only ones that can uphold the criteria over those who can’t. However, when it comes to the Law, Jesus’s death and resurrection made it possible for all to be accepted by God without having to follow the Law (though it is still encouraged to follow aspects of the Law in honor to God). Knowing this truth, that should encourage people to live more like Jesus than those who followed just the Law, because Jesus’s mindset sees all as God’s children and worth saving.
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4. Believe You Could Be or Are Your Own Jesus
This is one that might be connected to prosperity faith, where if you pray on something for a certain amount of time, and desire it enough, you will see it happen. This is a dangerous warning sign of a holier-than-thou attitude because it is believing that you are your own Jesus, or even a controller of God, in that you can make certain things happen in your life, while avoiding other things (such as cancer, death, or hurtful actions of others). Some Christians have found themselves in this belief from time to time, believing that God wouldn’t withhold certain blessings from them or bring sadness and hardship into their lives.
What we must realize is that if God sent His own son to die a horrible death on the cross to bring others salvation, why would we assume that we would never experience struggle and seasons of waiting just because we are born-again Christians? With this change in mentality, we will understand that we can’t prevent certain aspects of life from happening just because we prayed hard to stop or start it. God has a plan for everyone and that plan will be for our betterment and growth, regardless of whether we want certain blessings or not.
5. Being Blinded to Others’ Needs Because of Focus on Self
In contrast from the first warning sign, the fifth warning sign of displaying a holier-than-thou attitude is one in which people feel that their problems must be handled first, or all the time, before they can help anyone else. It is considered a holier-than-thou warning sign because it is showing your belief that what is happening in your life is far more important than others, almost as though they can’t be going through the same hardships that you are having.
If you feel you are starting to only be focused on your issues, whether intentionally or because you have a holier-than-thou attitude, take a moment to think about what the person across from you is going through or even what is going on in the lives of your family and friends. Talk with them and listen to what they are sharing, for as you listen to them, you will start to see the anxieties over your issues dwindle a little. Or, use your problems as a way to relate to one another and maybe they can offer advice to help with what you are going through.
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Seeking Humility
We live in a world where it is easy to slip into having a holier-than-thou attitude, especially when you are a Christian and become more of a Pharisee than tax collector from Jesus’s parable. However, there is hope to be released from the clutches of a holier-than-thou attitude, even when you don’t see you have adopted one. By taking note of the warning signs offered in this article, you can see how you (or someone you know) has started to show superior feelings over others and ways to stop this behavior in its tracks.
Disregarding a holier-than-thou attitude means that you can see yourself and others in a humbler light, in need of Jesus to not only take away our sins, but show us a way to love those around us in brotherly and sisterly love. We are all God’s children, created with different purposes in mind, and when we see how a holier-than-thou attitude can blind us to that truth, we start to realize the dangers of it and how it distances us from others and from God.
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