The Kind of Man Every Woman Wants

Shulammite gladly gives herself to Solomon in response to his request, and he, no doubt, is happy to receive her gift of lovemaking. Picking up on the imagery of wine, Shulammite expresses her desire to satisfy and bring pleasure to her husband. The wine flows "smoothly for my love," she says, "gliding past my lips and teeth!" The NKJV says, "The wine goes down smoothly for my beloved, moving gently the lips of sleepers" (i.e. the lovers). They are making love to one another and it is delightful—like sweet, intoxicating wine. They exchange kisses and intimate expressions of love that each finds satisfying, and then they restfully fall to sleep in a warm embrace. His goal is to satisfy and please 159her, which he does. Her goal is to satisfy and please him, which she does. When there is mutual giving with the goal of pleasing our mate, the marvelous result is that both spouses experience the joy and pleasure God intended (cf. 1 Cor 7:3-4; Phil 2:3-5).

Practical Applications from Song of Songs 6:11-7:10

Proverbs 32: The Husband of Noble Character

A husband of noble character: who can find one? He is worth more than winning the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes or the lottery.

His wife has full confidence in him and she lacks nothing of importance.

He brings her good, not harm, all the days of her life.

He works hard to provide for his family. Getting up early he helps get the children ready for school, then dashes off to work.

With his shoulder to the grindstone he works with energy and vigor, as one who is working for the Lord (Col 3:23). And while busy, he always finds time to call his wife during the day just to say, "I love you."

He promptly comes home from work and immediately pitches in with the chores, helping the children with their homework, or with making dinner if he can cook! While hot dogs and baked beans are his specialty, he doesn't fear the microwave, remembering nothing metal should be in there. He does this with such ease that all are amazed and in awe.

When his wife prepares a meal he always eats with gusto, and when finished, he never forgets to smile and tell her how great the meal was. Of course, he is always the first to volunteer to do the dishes or at least to volunteer the children to complete the task!

All in all, he is a joy to have in the kitchen.

As a father, there is no equal on the face of the earth. No matter how exhausted from work or chores, he always takes time for his children.

Whether it's making funny faces at the baby, tickling the small child, wrestling with the kids, watching football with his sons, or making pained and disbelieving expressions at his teenagers, he is always there for them.

160He is a whiz at math, science, spelling, geography, Spanish, and any other subject his children are studying at school.

And if he should be totally ignorant of the subject at hand, he skillfully hides his ignorance by sending the child to their mother.

He can fix any problem, from a scraped knee to loose bicycle chains, from interpreting rules for a kickball game to refereeing sparring matches between his kids.

More importantly, he is also the spiritual leader in the family. He loves Jesus, and he always takes the family to church. He shows his children, by his example, what it means to be a man of God.

He teaches his children how to pray and the importance of knowing and loving the Lord Jesus. He often rises early to pray for his wife and children, and he reads from his Bible at night before sleeping.

He disciplines his children with loving firmness, never by yelling or with humiliating words. He is always more interested in teaching a lesson than in simply punishing.

During the day he meditates on God's Word and on how to live it. He shows Christ in all his dealing with others and is considered a valuable employee by his bosses. His co-workers respect his hard work, his integrity, and his kindness.

He always shows his wife the utmost respect, even opening the door for her. He is always quick with a word of encouragement, and is constantly telling her how beautiful she is, even when she isn't wearing any make-up.

A day seldom passes that he doesn't tell her of his love for her. Praise for her is always on his lips.

Anniversaries and birthdays are never forgotten and gifts and flowers are often given, "just because."

He even makes superhuman efforts to be nice when her family is visiting.

He is full of compassion for the pain of others and willingly helps those in need. Whether it's changing a stranger's flat tire, helping with a friend's home improvement project, or feeding the poor at the local soup kitchen, he is the first to volunteer.

161He is not afraid to shed a tear with a friend in pain or to be rowdy in laughter at another's joke.

He loves life and lives it with passion.

His children, while not always calling him "blessed," have no doubts about his great love for them. His wife also calls him many things, among them, "the best man there is," and she thanks God for him.

Many men do great things but he surpasses them all. There is no man better than this man, except Jesus.

Flattery is deceptive and good looks, like hair, is fleeting, but a man who fears the Lord is to be praised. Give him the reward he has earned, and let his deeds bring him praise. His Lord is pleased, his wife loves him, and his children are proud of him. He is a blessed man indeed.15

The king (7:5) in our text sees his bride as beautiful (7:1, 6). She belongs to him, and his desire is for her (7:10). He sees her as virtually flawless, with no imperfection (4:7). Of course she is not literally flawless and perfect. There has never lived on this earth such a bride. I guess a good question to ask is, will there ever be such a bride?

Well, the good news, gospel answer, is "yes!" There will indeed be such a bride that will not only appear perfect, she will be perfect. This will not be an earthly bride, but a heavenly one, one made perfect by the Bridegroom who has cleansed her by His blood and made her pure and spotless from head to toe. Once more our Song prepares us for the awesome and glorious truth of Ephesians 5:25-27: "Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her to make her holy, cleansing her with the washing of water by the word. He did this to present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or anything like that, but holy and blameless."

This is what this bride is destined to be, and the good news of the gospel is, you can be a part of this bride. Repent of sin and look in faith 162to the Bridegroom, King Jesus, who loved you and gave Himself for you. His love for you is great. His cleansing power cannot fail. He longs to make you beautiful. He longs for you to be His.

Come, ye sinners, poor and needy,

Weak and wounded, sick and sore;

Jesus ready stands to save you,

Full of pity, love, and pow'r.

I will arise and go to Jesus,

He will embrace me in His arms;

In the arms of my dear Savior,

Oh, there are ten thousand charms. (Hart, "Come, Ye Sinners")

See Deere, 1022; Gledhill, 199.

This section draws heavily from Akin, God on Sex, 213-15.

Carr (Song, 162-63) notes that breath could be a reference in the Hebrew language to the nipples of her breasts. Garrett (Proverbs, 422) concurs.

Adapted and revised version of a poem by Michael M. Jones, a former student at Southern Seminary in Louisville, Kentucky, 1996.